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November 29, 2016

Lovely is finally shipping the Fitbit for sexy times

Do you and your partner often do sex? Do you want to know how much sex you’re doing? And do you want to know how good it is and how good it could be? What is sex? Does anyone know? Can Lovely help us find out?

Hopefully, because I’m confused.

Created by Jakub Konik and Tomasz Badyla Lovely is a thinger that goes on your other thinger and measures your position, speed, and attack angles. It isn’t a vibrator per se but more of a sensor that also doubles as a stimulating sex add-on. Once you’re done with the sex time you can look at your phone and get expert advice on how you did (Bad, Fair, Good, and Cool Ranch) and what sex positions to try later.

“Over two years ago after particularly intense night with my partner we started wondering how many calories we just burned. I replied that there must be an app for that and actually started looking for it, but found nothing. I did some more research, talked to sexologists, industrial designers and engineers, and realized that we could create a device that not only tells you how many calories you burn during sex, but actually understands your desires and helps you to pursue them,” said Konik.

The team hopes to create an ecosystem of sex tools for people who have and/or enjoy sex. We have yet to actually try this thing yet but rest assured a pedometer for your peder seems fairly interesting if you’re really into the quantified self. They’re selling pre-orders on for $99 and they even show pictures of how sex works on their website which could be helpful for folks who don’t know. As they say in G.I. Joe: “Knowing is half the battle.”

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